“WESTMINSTER POLICE COURT.–Policeman X brought a paper of doggerel verses to the MAGISTRATE, which had been thrust into his hands, X said, by an Italian boy, who ran away immediately afterwards.
“The MAGISTRATE, after perusing the lines, looked hard at X, and said he did not think they were written by an Italian.
“X, blushing, said he thought the paper read in Court last week, and which frightened so the old gentleman to whom it was addressed, was also not of Italian origin.”
O SIGNOR BRODERIP, you are a wickid ole man,
You wexis us little horgin-boys whenever you can:
How dare you talk of Justice, and go for to seek
To pussicute us horgin-boys, you senguinary Beek?
Though you set in Vestminster surrounded by your crushers,
Harrogint and habsolute like the Hortocrat of hall the Rushers,
Yet there is a better vurld I’d have you for to know,
Likewise a place vere the henimies of horgin-boys will go.
O you vickid HEROD without any pity!
London vithout horgin-boys vood be a dismal city.
Sweet SAINT CICILY who first taught horgin-pipes to blow,
Soften the heart of this Magistrit that haggerywates us so!
Good Italian gentlemen, fatherly and kind,
Brings us over to London here our horgins for to grind;
Sends us out vith little vite mice and guinea-pigs also
A popping of the Veasel and a Jumpin of JIM CROW.
And as us young horgin-boys is grateful in our turn
We gives to these kind gentlemen hall the money we earn,
Because that they vood vop up as wery wel we know
Unless we brought our hurnings back to them as loves us so.
O MR. BRODERIP! wery much I’m surprise,
Ven you take your valks abroad where can be your eyes?
If a Beak had a heart then you’d compryend
Us pore little horgin-boys was the poor man’s friend.
Don’t you see the shildren in the droring-rooms
Clapping of their little ands when they year our toons?
On their mothers’ bussums don’t you see the babbies crow
And down to us dear horgin-boys lots of apence throw?
Don’t you see the ousemaids (pooty POLLIES and MARIES),
Ven ve bring our urdigurdis, smiling from the hairies?
Then they come out vith a slice o’ cole puddn or a bit o’ bacon or so
And give it us young horgin-boys for lunch afore we go.
Have you ever seen the Hirish children sport
When our velcome music-box brings sunshine in the Court?
To these little paupers who can never pay
Surely all good horgin-boys, for GOD’S love, will play.
Has for those proud gentlemen, like a serting B–k
(Vich I von’t be pussonal and therefore vil not speak),
That flings their parler-vinders hup von ve begin to play
And cusses us and swears at us in such a wiolent way,
Instedd of their abewsing and calling hout Poleece
Let em send out JOHN to us vith six-pence or a shillin apiece.
Then like good young horgin-boys avay from there we’ll go,
Blessing sweet SAINT CICILY that taught our pipes to blow.